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Hammer A woman plots revenge against her unfaithful ex. My role(s) in this film: Actor Submitted by DawnAkemi on September 1, 2007 - 1:12am. |
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AMAZING ACTING
Both are wonderful in acting
Thank you, Victor!
I appreciate you effusive praise of our work! Thank you for taking the time to watch!!
(blushing)
Dawn Akemi is a STAR!!
You just can't help but be drawn to her light.
Gimme those legs, dammit!!
I'm gonna nibble them to death!!!
I certainly don't know how I earned such a wonderful, beautiful slantee sistah!!!
Thank you, Cici!
I'd like to see the "Crazy Lady Violence"
I'd like to see the "Crazy Lady Violence". Is that the sequel? ;)
I think this one should've been called, "Crazy Man's Stupidity", becuase whoever would cheat on such a lovely women, is clearly the crazy one. She's so smokin'! :-P
Anyway, this was a really good story. That's the first I've seen of Dawn's acting...and me really likey. :)
My "Crazy Lady Violence", in real life, is Medieval!!!
So don't cheat on me, Eric, by stalking someone else!!!
Thank you for watching and for your sweet and generous comments!
How can I cheat???
This would have to be a relationship, if I were even able to cheat. Otherwise, there is no commitment to "cheat" on. haha.
But my car is only 11 months old....and I am barely making my car payments...so I'll be good.
defining relationship
Eric... we are in a "relationship": "...a state involving mutual dealings between people or parties or countries..." You should know that I am highly possessive in my relationships and keep a tight reign!
So no cheating or I will go Medieval on you ass!!!!
Dawn: the Dictator?
But by that definition, you are in a relationship with everyone you know. So, wouldn't you be cheating on everyone you know? ;)
Also, if you keep a tight reign in a relationship, then that means you control the lives of everyone you know.
Does this sound like a correct assessment? And, if so, just what would you mean by "cheating"? Go ahead, tell me. What are my boundries? :-P
Oh, and let's not forget, when do I get my kiss? Or, do I have to fill out a standard release form first?
And, what about all these corollary bylaws? Do they really contractually bind me to a 100% Satisfaction Guarantee, or you get to punish me under Statute 1138, Paragraph 42, Section 3; titled the "Dawn Akemi Pleasure Clause"? I find that highly unfair. But granted, I get highly confused reading this 400 page contract you sent me.
So, where do I sign? :-D
More like Empress!
I don't remember offering any benefits to you for serving under me. Should I offer benefits, they are removable at my whim.
All those under my control do so purely out the joy of being our servant.
Your boundries are those decided on my whim at any given point in time, so be on your toes as to my ever changing moods.
I, however, as Empress, can never be defined as cheating as my rights to all are inherent in my divinity.
If you need something written down, by all means, please sign away. Punishment is assured for lack satisfaction, whether it be written down or no.
Nobody said life was fair.
Tee, hee... I like being Empress!
Renigging
Then, I refuse to sign...I can't be in that sort of abusive relationship. :-P
Awww, c'mon Eric... I'll let you hold the whip sometimes!
Don't make me beg!
I'm still begging!
Flog, flog.... grog!
To impress an Empress
Tops to bottoms and bottoms to Tops. Soo much work being a Top, constantly having to think up things for ones servants to do, and fail at. "Spill the whine on the white rug, and then I have to punish you, well of course they are going to spill the wine, it is the punushment they crave. So rude.
To get medievil on someone's ass, would that be like giving them anemic dysentery, Fungal growth, or other unpleasant hygenic disorders.
Remember bathing in medieval times could kill you, it takes a lot to heat a room, so unless you were very rich, a bath once a year would do - Usually end of May as the weather warmed, which explains June Brides, because you still smelled okay in June.
There was a word for people who practiced medievil birth control - "Parents"
Queen Elizabeth brushed her teth with honey (as did everyone back then) before they all rotted and were lost.
Also the reason that chair and table legs have (had) those rounded areas at the bottom is because there used to be cloth doilies placed there because an exposed ankle was considered the height of racy behaviour, so that was extended to chairs and table "Legs" Until the wodworkewrs just started to carve them that way.
Antebellum houses had two front stairs one for the men, and one for the women, for if an unmarried man, saw an unmarried lady's ankle, he was honor bound to aske her to marry him. Don't ask me what happened if either was married -probably they just had sex.
George Reeves is one of the Tarletown twins seen first in Gone With The Wind.
I've been on too many tours, and played with one to many medival recreation group, and I'm a DAD, so I'm supposed to know everything.
Steven Gladstone
Director/Cinematographer
http://www.gladstonefilms.com
fun facts, medieval style
This was very entertaining, Steven!
Boy... brushing teeth with honey makes me cringe... I can feel my own teeth rotting... eeeek!
(showing you my ankle)
Is the guy her roommate?
Is the guy her roommate? With a roommate from the opposite sex, you'd think she would be cheating too.
roommate with benefits?
I agree, Brendan, that the relationship between my character and the guy is not clearly established.
Of course, we all know that I'm not the cheating kind.... am totally loyal to Cici!
Thank you for watching!!!
Um... Brendan?
The roommate's gay, dude... A beard and a scarf in the middle of summer? He's making TEA, for Christ's sake!
People assume alot!
Yeah... cause Cici and I live on opposite coasts and she's given me the best sex I've ever had!!!
Hey, sexy slantee!
Are you still in the same "state" you were in when you last emailed me??
Oh, Cici!!!
We live in the same "state"!
It's a dream come true!!!!
Yeah, I guess he is
Yeah, I guess he is gay.
Maybe the reason her boyfriend cheated on her was because he assumed what I assumed earlier.
Marriage, sex, and death
Wait, just wait until there are kids, then see what happens. A Full diaper in the middle of the night is certainly not a turn on (well perhaps for some it is.)
Sleep suddenly becomes much more important, Besides, the male sex drive works on the chase, not the having. Once you've married the woman, The chase is over. But don't tell this to single men, otherwise there would be no more weddings, and all those wedding planners would go out of business, and probably turn to politics.
Me, I still chase my wife. . . although with her being 4 months pregnant, she can't run so fast.
Steven Gladstone
Director/Cinematographer
http://www.gladstonefilms.com
sexual appetites
I don't know, Steven... I've had my share boyfriends/husbands that felt confident they didn't need to "chase" me anymore and their sex drive remained as strong as ever.
Perhaps this theory is one of those old wives-tales!
Oh, I made a punny
Hammer
I watched Hammer last weekend and really enjoyed being able to see some of your work. Great job!! I was happy to see it on the front page today. Is there more out on the web?
Right after watching it I was talking with a friend about how we need motivation to eat better and exercise more. I told her to check out this video, because my new crew mate is tiny and in freakin' amazing shape! She agrees. So, now you are our role model.
We made a pact that we have to email each other at the end of every day with what we have eaten and what exercise we have done. Amazingly, it's helping. I believe her exact words were "I will do better tomorrow now that I know I will report to your skinny butt!!!" If you wanna let us in on your secrets we would be most grateful. 
"The thing to determine conclusively is whether you are in a comedy or a tragedy."--Dr. Jules Hilbert, Stranger Than Fiction
Jan... thank you, I'm sooo very flattered!
First, I have to say that I'm digging your sexy cartoon avatar... feeds my anime fantasies!!!
Secondly... you have given me a very high honor... thank you! I hardly think of myself as a role model. And thank you spending the time to not only watch "Hammer" but send your friends too! I feel very gratified.
I wish I could offer you some simple secrets to staying in shape, but I have to be honest... its persistence and dedication, and making a life style choice. Peppered on this site from way back in May or so are blogs and comments about my bouts with both bulimia and being overweight. So I have a great deal of compassion and understanding for how difficult it is to stay in shape... its been a long journey for me.
I guess my overall plan is I eat alot of vegetables, especially greens, some meats, alot of dairy, limited fats and sweets, and a lot of carbs. My biggest mantra is moderation. Essentially, I stay away from processed foods, cook everything myself (I mostly eat at home). My biggest indulgence is alcohol, but only in a weekend warrior kind of way.... ;-)
I think I'm lucky cause I am very curious about food and love to cook. There is a lot of contradictory information out there so we have to teach ourselves what is good for us. Gradually, over the last several years, I've been switching to organic and sustainably farmed foods (which are more nutritious and taste better)... I also recently switched to raw (unpasturized) milk... I love it! If you want, I can send you to some books and websites... please let me know...
I do workout... mostly hiking up a mountain park (Griffith Park) near my home several times a week, sometimes I run, and I do some very limited weight lifing at the gym and at home. I take the stairs, not the escalator. I walk, instead of drive, whenever possible.
It's great that you have a supportive friend to motivate you! That really helps.
If you want more info... feel free to ask.
excellent
This was well shot, well edited, and definately the acting is the highlight.
thank you, sonnyboo!
I appreciate your time and graciousness. Thanks also for subscribing to my youtube videos... you are my very first subscriber!!!
A real man...
...would have helped you smash the car and bought you ice cream afterwards on the way home.
"Baffling the critics since 1971."
MmmmMMM... ice cream... MmMmmMm!
You sure know how to sweet talk a girl, Turzman! I now know where to go for a good shoulder to cry on.
Thanks for watching!!!
you're welcome
If you have a window in need of smashing, don't hesitate to call me. As for sweet-talking women, I let the sweets talk for themselves.
"Baffling the critics since 1971."
The way to a woman's heart is through her stomach!!
I may just take you up on that offer, Turzman!!!
Looking forward to it.
The way to my stomach goes past my heart, so we almost have that in common.
"Baffling the critics since 1971."
Time For A Sequel
Oh, Empress Dawn, I've seen this film so many times! It is a classic... But I'm waiting for the sequel:
HAMMER II: Revenge Of The Jealous Roomie
See, I'm assuming that your roommate isn't gay, and is therefore driven crazy by having to live with you and listen to your heartaches without enjoying any "benefits" on the side. He picks up the weapon this time. I want more yelling, more hammer, more banging... especially more banging...
There will be more banging alright!!!
Cause in your scenario, your imagining that I would simply take advantage of a man by crying on his shoulder, boring him with my heartaches, and offering nothing in return... but this isn't my way....
Hence the sequel:
Jackhammer: The Roomie's Plunge
...where the roomie gets benefits, becomes transition boyfriend, then the great love of my life! But then, he was just using my heartache to get laid and isn't interested in anything beyond that. He later has an affair... this time it won't just be car windows!!!
How about that Emperor Dave?
Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
How about I write the guy part and you write the girl part?
Then we'd really have a drama on our hands...
Nobody Does it Better
Guy's parts and girl's parts... what are we talking about, Dave?
Penises and Vaginas.
Penises and Vaginas.
Brendan... I'm shocked!
That's cocks and pussies, please!!!
Or given the ongoing pirate theme: planks and clams!
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